My father died months before my high school graduation. Grief-stricken, the impatience inside me grew. High school classrooms and coursework no longer held my interest. As a good student who got good grades, there were no plans to take the SATs. No more learning. No more teachers, or so, I thought. I already had a job and was ready to go full-time; out of one cage and into another.
My concentration on my coursework waned. I felt trapped in an environment that no longer benefited me. I didn’t belong in school anymore. High school was for kids. Losing my dad at age 17 sped up the maturity process. During my last semester, my grades suffered. Luckily, I passed all my classes and graduated early— just barely.
As motivated as I was to leave school and get my diploma, there was no vision for the future. Freedom was in my sights, but I had no idea what to do with it. Untrained and undisciplined, I left one job after another feeling unfulfilled. My negative reactions to life’s difficulties only made things worse. Once again, I was feeling stuck.
In my youth, the people around me reacted to life instead of planning for it. When bad things happened, we felt the brunt of it. Unprepared, my mom went back to work at a factory to pay the bills after my dad died. She met him at a factory job before leaving the workforce to raise me, so she returned to the only thing she knew. If you don’t know something else exists, you won’t search for it.
I always wanted more from life, but I can’t tell you what “more” was. Desperate to avoid mediocrity, I attended college for a BA degree. There I learned more about myself and the power of education. Still, I was only going through the motions. I wasn’t all in.
After I earned my diploma, I still didn’t know where I was going. I still reacted to life instead of planning for it. The jobs I accepted after getting my degree were no improvement. I still wasn’t all in.
I was one of many out there who started without any big plans. I knew I wanted to be something and ended up a late bloomer. I made decisions on my own without asking for help. Which meant I took the scenic route instead of the major highway. At least I knew there was something different than where my life “wasn’t” heading.
Successful people always discuss having a vision and a plan for a meaningful life. I know many of us didn’t learn that at the starting gate. They didn’t have people in their lives that spoke life-changing words. But celebrating the little victories one step at a time can lead us into a better situation. There will be less blame placed on everyone and everything around us.